Baton Rouge Woman Shot in the Head

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Litrell Burnett, 35, a resident of Baton Rouge, was visiting her in-laws and while there went to a nearby supermarket to pick up some groceries. Later, her husband noticed her sitting in her car in the driveway with the windows rolled up and with her eyes closed, with both hands behind the back of her head. He became concerned and walked over to the car. He noticed that Litrell’s eyes were now open and she looked very strange. He asked her if she was okay, and Litrell replied that she had been shot in the back of the head and had been holding her brains in for over an hour.

The husband called the paramedics, who broke into the car because the doors were locked and Litrell refused to remove her hands from her head.

When they finally got in, they found that Litrell had a wad of bread dough on the back of her head. A Pillsbury biscuit canister had exploded from the heat, making a loud noise that sounded like a gunshot, and the wad of dough hit her in the back of her head. When she reached back to find out what it was, she felt the dough and thought it was her brains. She initially passed out, but quickly recovered. Litrell is black, a Democrat, and voted for Obama, but that could all be a coincidence.

The defective biscuit canister was analyzed, and it was determined to be George Bush’s fault.

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